Discover Save Your Marriage Insurance
Many people start out their married life with no doubts and no fears about their own abilities and the abilities of their spouse to maintain their wedded state.
Most people enter marriage with some anxiety about being with the right person and being able to work things out over the long haul.
Some of this comes from the fact that people are hard to really know, people change over time, and situations can come about that could threaten the best of marriages.
There is one very good strategy for all married couples to use from day one.
Close all of the exits from your marriage.
This will take some thought but will be worth all the time you spend now in the years to come.
What it means is that you will make a decision, right here and right now, that as far as you are concerned there is nothing that will cause you to even think about leaving your marriage.
Having this attitude of closed exits will keep you centered on the reasons you stay in your marriage and not on all the reasons you wish you could leave it.
During times of stress you will not be looking for ways out.
I remember a friend of mine who was getting married told me that it did not matter if she was certain she was doing the right thing because she could always fix it with a divorce! Sure enough, five years and two kids later she was divorced.
It looked to me like a self-fulfilling prophecy.
Marriage is not a guaranteed state and both parties need to be fully committed to it.
That is why closing the exits early on can be like having "save your marriage insurance.
" If you know that you are married for good then you are more motivated to learning the skills to make it run smoothly.
You will spend time and money on keeping it running well.
You will be less inclined to blame your partner when things are not working.
You will both be fully invested in staying the course.
When stress triggers disagreements, rather than walking away and wishing you could end it you will be more likely to hang in there and work through the problem.
If one of you gets ill or suffers emotional problems, the other one will not use that as a reason for leaving unless physical harm would result from staying.
It will instead be a reason for hanging in there with even more tenacity.
In fact, having this no exit attitude will go a long way toward cementing a strong, effective, and healthy relationship.
Most people enter marriage with some anxiety about being with the right person and being able to work things out over the long haul.
Some of this comes from the fact that people are hard to really know, people change over time, and situations can come about that could threaten the best of marriages.
There is one very good strategy for all married couples to use from day one.
Close all of the exits from your marriage.
This will take some thought but will be worth all the time you spend now in the years to come.
What it means is that you will make a decision, right here and right now, that as far as you are concerned there is nothing that will cause you to even think about leaving your marriage.
Having this attitude of closed exits will keep you centered on the reasons you stay in your marriage and not on all the reasons you wish you could leave it.
During times of stress you will not be looking for ways out.
I remember a friend of mine who was getting married told me that it did not matter if she was certain she was doing the right thing because she could always fix it with a divorce! Sure enough, five years and two kids later she was divorced.
It looked to me like a self-fulfilling prophecy.
Marriage is not a guaranteed state and both parties need to be fully committed to it.
That is why closing the exits early on can be like having "save your marriage insurance.
" If you know that you are married for good then you are more motivated to learning the skills to make it run smoothly.
You will spend time and money on keeping it running well.
You will be less inclined to blame your partner when things are not working.
You will both be fully invested in staying the course.
When stress triggers disagreements, rather than walking away and wishing you could end it you will be more likely to hang in there and work through the problem.
If one of you gets ill or suffers emotional problems, the other one will not use that as a reason for leaving unless physical harm would result from staying.
It will instead be a reason for hanging in there with even more tenacity.
In fact, having this no exit attitude will go a long way toward cementing a strong, effective, and healthy relationship.
