Is He Walking Out On You?
Is he walking out on you?How could he do that?How could he walk away from you?Haven't you done everything you can to take care of him and put up with him?This guy has some nerve! Actually, when someone walks out, it is usually a mutual decision.
It's just that one person may not see it that way.
But if you look closely...
BOTH people are miserable.
So, when your guy walks out, what can you do? In order to make sure the breakup is final, definitely seek counseling.
You don't want a back and forth situation going on in your life where sometimes he pops in and stays for a while, and then he leaves again.
Sometimes, a relationship can be saved when both people have a mediator.
If it can't be saved, at least you will have some kind of finality and understanding of what went wrong.
Second of all, if it is clear that he is never coming back, you need to shift your perception.
You might be able to move from the break up being ugly to having it become something that taught you a lot.
If you have suffered, make the suffering count for something.
Also-what you don't learn, you are doomed to repeat.
You don't want to be in this place again, so learn all you can.
Here are some questions you can ask yourself now, and then look to see if you had any of the following.
Why do people break up?What happens to them?You may recognize some of these traits: ·Addicted to substances or destructive behaviors Leaving a relationship happens when one person has an addiction.
That addiction is their first priority.
People break up because of addiction to substances, and also because of gambling, lying, cheating, violent outbursts, and infidelity.
Both parties need counseling.
If the person with these habits won't get help, get counseling for yourself so you can understand why you are attracted to this type of individual.
·Being equals One person will walk out if one of you is a hard worker, and the other one is lazy; if one person has worked hard for a career and the other one has never done a day's work.
This is not an equal relationship, when one person needs the other one to take care of them.
If you do not have your own life that you are proud of, you may be trying to get your needs fulfilled by living vicariously through someone else.
Eventually, the other person feels drained from propping you up.
Romantic relationships endure when they are between equals.
If he is leaving you, get a life first, before you get another boyfriend.
·The big compromise Is he walking out because you thought you couldn't find anyone better, so you settled for someone who was just there?One of the ways you will know you have settled for less than what you want is when you are more attracted to other men than the one you are with.
·Fear of Loneliness When he walks out, you may have to deal with the fact that you cannot stand to be alone.
Do you work hard at carefully hiding your terror of being alone?Do you think that if you found someone, all your worries would be over?Unfortunately, they would just be beginning.
You would still have your own insecurities to deal with, while adding those of another person.
·What really matters to you He may have walked out because one or more of his values were not being honored.
Everyone has certain requirements that have to be met.
If one person values trust and honesty, and the other one has been caught lying, their prognosis as a happy, healthy couple is not good.
Why is he walking out on you?If you have any of the above behaviors or qualities, he might want to walk.
The real work here, however, is for you to not walk out on yourself.
You want to rediscover your own life.
That takes courage, energy, and help.
But this is what makes you attractive and irresistible.
When you reach that inner knowing, and if he doesn't want to be there, neither do you.
You have better things to do.
It's time for you to laugh again and shine in the life you make for yourself.
It is then that you need to remember-someone wonderful is waiting for you.
It's just that one person may not see it that way.
But if you look closely...
BOTH people are miserable.
So, when your guy walks out, what can you do? In order to make sure the breakup is final, definitely seek counseling.
You don't want a back and forth situation going on in your life where sometimes he pops in and stays for a while, and then he leaves again.
Sometimes, a relationship can be saved when both people have a mediator.
If it can't be saved, at least you will have some kind of finality and understanding of what went wrong.
Second of all, if it is clear that he is never coming back, you need to shift your perception.
You might be able to move from the break up being ugly to having it become something that taught you a lot.
If you have suffered, make the suffering count for something.
Also-what you don't learn, you are doomed to repeat.
You don't want to be in this place again, so learn all you can.
Here are some questions you can ask yourself now, and then look to see if you had any of the following.
Why do people break up?What happens to them?You may recognize some of these traits: ·Addicted to substances or destructive behaviors Leaving a relationship happens when one person has an addiction.
That addiction is their first priority.
People break up because of addiction to substances, and also because of gambling, lying, cheating, violent outbursts, and infidelity.
Both parties need counseling.
If the person with these habits won't get help, get counseling for yourself so you can understand why you are attracted to this type of individual.
·Being equals One person will walk out if one of you is a hard worker, and the other one is lazy; if one person has worked hard for a career and the other one has never done a day's work.
This is not an equal relationship, when one person needs the other one to take care of them.
If you do not have your own life that you are proud of, you may be trying to get your needs fulfilled by living vicariously through someone else.
Eventually, the other person feels drained from propping you up.
Romantic relationships endure when they are between equals.
If he is leaving you, get a life first, before you get another boyfriend.
·The big compromise Is he walking out because you thought you couldn't find anyone better, so you settled for someone who was just there?One of the ways you will know you have settled for less than what you want is when you are more attracted to other men than the one you are with.
·Fear of Loneliness When he walks out, you may have to deal with the fact that you cannot stand to be alone.
Do you work hard at carefully hiding your terror of being alone?Do you think that if you found someone, all your worries would be over?Unfortunately, they would just be beginning.
You would still have your own insecurities to deal with, while adding those of another person.
·What really matters to you He may have walked out because one or more of his values were not being honored.
Everyone has certain requirements that have to be met.
If one person values trust and honesty, and the other one has been caught lying, their prognosis as a happy, healthy couple is not good.
Why is he walking out on you?If you have any of the above behaviors or qualities, he might want to walk.
The real work here, however, is for you to not walk out on yourself.
You want to rediscover your own life.
That takes courage, energy, and help.
But this is what makes you attractive and irresistible.
When you reach that inner knowing, and if he doesn't want to be there, neither do you.
You have better things to do.
It's time for you to laugh again and shine in the life you make for yourself.
It is then that you need to remember-someone wonderful is waiting for you.
