How to Gain Confidence - 3 Steps to Eliminating Limiting Beliefs
Most of us, when we think of beliefs, think of political and religious beliefs.
But the fact is that we have beliefs about everything in life.
Some of these beliefs are positive, others are neutral, but the most damaging ones are the negative or limiting beliefs.
These are the beliefs that severely restrict us.
These are the things These are the things that we just "know" we can't do.
"I could never get that promotion at work" "I could never date someone that attractive" "I could never start my own business" "I could never write my own novel" If you want to learn how to gain confidence, you need to learn how to eliminate your limiting beliefs.
If you have a limiting belief in a particular area, you will always be searching for evidence that it is true.
For instance, a person with high self-confidence will arrive at a party and feel that people like them and want to talk to them.
A person with low self-confidence will feel insecure, imagine the worst and try and avoid the situation.
If you want to eliminate limiting beliefs, there are 3 steps you need to follow.
Find out what your limiting beliefs are.
This step involves looking at situations that you have been in where you have had feelings of low confidence.
Let's take the example above, of someone who felt low in confidence at a party.
Notice the thoughts that you have in that situation.
In the party example it might be "Everyone else seems really comfortable and confident except me" From these thoughts, you can work out some beliefs that you have that are limiting you.
For instance "I am able to tell what other people are feeling just by looking at them" "I am the only person in the room who is not confident" Once you have isolated some beliefs that you have about the situation, examine them for thinking errors and then dispute them.
So, the belief that "I am able to tell what other people are feeling just by looking at them" is a bit of a stretch of imagination.
How can someone possibly always know what other people are feeling? Some people appear confident and they aren't.
And it's probably a gross exaggeration that everyone else in the room is confident but that person.
With practice, you can isolate the beliefs that drive low confidence and you can get very quick and effective at disputing and eliminating limiting beliefs.
But the fact is that we have beliefs about everything in life.
Some of these beliefs are positive, others are neutral, but the most damaging ones are the negative or limiting beliefs.
These are the beliefs that severely restrict us.
These are the things These are the things that we just "know" we can't do.
"I could never get that promotion at work" "I could never date someone that attractive" "I could never start my own business" "I could never write my own novel" If you want to learn how to gain confidence, you need to learn how to eliminate your limiting beliefs.
If you have a limiting belief in a particular area, you will always be searching for evidence that it is true.
For instance, a person with high self-confidence will arrive at a party and feel that people like them and want to talk to them.
A person with low self-confidence will feel insecure, imagine the worst and try and avoid the situation.
If you want to eliminate limiting beliefs, there are 3 steps you need to follow.
Find out what your limiting beliefs are.
This step involves looking at situations that you have been in where you have had feelings of low confidence.
Let's take the example above, of someone who felt low in confidence at a party.
Notice the thoughts that you have in that situation.
In the party example it might be "Everyone else seems really comfortable and confident except me" From these thoughts, you can work out some beliefs that you have that are limiting you.
For instance "I am able to tell what other people are feeling just by looking at them" "I am the only person in the room who is not confident" Once you have isolated some beliefs that you have about the situation, examine them for thinking errors and then dispute them.
So, the belief that "I am able to tell what other people are feeling just by looking at them" is a bit of a stretch of imagination.
How can someone possibly always know what other people are feeling? Some people appear confident and they aren't.
And it's probably a gross exaggeration that everyone else in the room is confident but that person.
With practice, you can isolate the beliefs that drive low confidence and you can get very quick and effective at disputing and eliminating limiting beliefs.
