Some Tips To Help You Learn To Say No
Let's face it - - women often find it difficult to say this two-letter word.
Raised to think of others first, they cannot bring themselves to knock back a raffle ticket or refuse a committee position even though they are worn out.
Here are some tips on how to say NO obligingly.
Saying No to Children Say "No" to daily whingeing for treats at the shops by agreeing to a certain number each week.
Remind your child where the tally stands.
Rein in teenage demands for lifts and money in the same way: "I will drive you/pick you up from two events in a month.
You choose.
" Saying No to your partner He feels amorous and you are absolutely exhausted.
He feels romantic and you feel a little cranky.
He wants you to put on that lacy negligee and you want to curl up in your old dressing gown.
This requires diplomacy.
Be frank, "You are gorgeous, but I am just not in the mood.
Let's have a big night tomorrow, okay?" Saying No to the extended family This year the family wants to come to you for Christmas again; or, your sister and her husband insist you attend your nephew's convocation.
Saying NO to relatives is tough but, provided you are not always doing it, you need have no guilt feelings.
If all the work lands on you each year, stand up and say so.
"I find Christmas Day a lot of work, so this year we have decided to celebrate alone, but we will get together at New Year".
Or, "This year I am going to ask each of you to bring something.
" Or, "We are thinking of going away.
" This is a good reply because you need not actually go.
It just means they cannot count on you.
As to the convocation, try, "It sounds wonderful, but we are busy that day.
" Do not invent complex excuses because you are your husband might get the story wrong later.
Saying No at work It is easy to find yourself overloaded with work.
Feeling frazzled and resentful is not a good career move.
Neither is doing things badly, or letting people down when you have taken on too much.
Instead, take a light approach, "If you can find me another pair of hands, I am all yours".
Or, "Actually my husband was expecting me home tonight...
this might have to wait until tomorrow.
" Or, "I will add it to my list, but at the moment, I am afraid it is at the bottom.
"
Raised to think of others first, they cannot bring themselves to knock back a raffle ticket or refuse a committee position even though they are worn out.
Here are some tips on how to say NO obligingly.
Saying No to Children Say "No" to daily whingeing for treats at the shops by agreeing to a certain number each week.
Remind your child where the tally stands.
Rein in teenage demands for lifts and money in the same way: "I will drive you/pick you up from two events in a month.
You choose.
" Saying No to your partner He feels amorous and you are absolutely exhausted.
He feels romantic and you feel a little cranky.
He wants you to put on that lacy negligee and you want to curl up in your old dressing gown.
This requires diplomacy.
Be frank, "You are gorgeous, but I am just not in the mood.
Let's have a big night tomorrow, okay?" Saying No to the extended family This year the family wants to come to you for Christmas again; or, your sister and her husband insist you attend your nephew's convocation.
Saying NO to relatives is tough but, provided you are not always doing it, you need have no guilt feelings.
If all the work lands on you each year, stand up and say so.
"I find Christmas Day a lot of work, so this year we have decided to celebrate alone, but we will get together at New Year".
Or, "This year I am going to ask each of you to bring something.
" Or, "We are thinking of going away.
" This is a good reply because you need not actually go.
It just means they cannot count on you.
As to the convocation, try, "It sounds wonderful, but we are busy that day.
" Do not invent complex excuses because you are your husband might get the story wrong later.
Saying No at work It is easy to find yourself overloaded with work.
Feeling frazzled and resentful is not a good career move.
Neither is doing things badly, or letting people down when you have taken on too much.
Instead, take a light approach, "If you can find me another pair of hands, I am all yours".
Or, "Actually my husband was expecting me home tonight...
this might have to wait until tomorrow.
" Or, "I will add it to my list, but at the moment, I am afraid it is at the bottom.
"
