How to Rescue Your Marriage from Fighting If you need powerful, effective tips on how to have a better marriage, you need more than the weak and ambiguous secular advice, such as simply talking more.
I want to share with you steps that my wife and I, who are strong believers, use to make your relationship or marriage better.
Anytime we talk with our married friends who are having problems in their marriages, we always share these easy steps.
These are the 5 easy ways to save your marriage from the fights that break down your bonds.
The best part is that this relationship help is fast, you can begin to rescue your relationship today! 1.
Take time to simmer.
In the heat of the moment of a fight in a troubled marriage, you or your spouse is likely to say something horrible which you don't really mean and will wish you could take back.
That's why you need to take some time to calm down when you are fighting.
When things begin to get out of hand, simply suggest that you both go think for awhile about what is REALLY the problem in your marriage or relationship.
When you come back, you will actually have things to talk about to help make things better, rather than a load more of guilt and hurts from careless and angry words.
2.
Evaluate YOU.
It is often a shock to think that you might be the cause to your bad marriage.
Many times insecurities drive a husband or wife to constantly look for things which could be a problem.
Maybe you are seeing things that just are not there.
Or maybe you are being hurt by little things that you then let build up inside of you and turn into resentment.
These things will come back out later, and in a much worse and tricky manner.
This passive aggressive tendency could be what is fueling most of your marital problems.
Finally, evaluate your sexual responsiveness.
If you feel you have sexual issues, look for some specific information.
It could be as simple as needing some extra sex advice or tips.
The good news now is that even if you are the source of the problems, you can be the source of the solution! When you follow the previous step of taking time to calm yourself and think of what the real issue, you can also consider any problems you may be the root of.
Then you will have an even more meaningful experience in your attempt to improve your marriage.
3.
Work it out together.
This is the step where the most progress takes place.
But it is also the step that is the easiest.
See, at this point you have already prevented more problems, taken time to calm down, and identified the key issues that are creating the marriage problems you need to fix.
Now you both get to come back together to fix your problems in your marriage.
I know this can be awkward at first.
But it really is simple.
You just need to take the results of the previous step and talk about them with your spouse.
What has worked really well for us it to take turns explaining what we feel is the real problem.
This is so simple, but so many books make it seem complicated by calling it something like Fair Fighting.
Essentially, it's just talking, but with a purpose.
4.
Make some good memories together in the mean time.
What we have noticed in our experiences is that when we do not spend enough positive time together, we tend to have more marital problems.
It is this quality time that really makes things better in your troubled marriage.
Although we still have our problems, we always refer to the first steps in how to work through our marital problems.
We have developed a simple rule for dealing with this.
"Anytime we have a fight, we schedule a date to do something fun or romantic together.
" We have been following this rule for several years now with amazing success.
Our friends have been using the same rule, and you can too.
5.
Stay Committed.
These steps that we use are great, fast, simple, and easy.
You can literally begin to save your marriage today.
But the most crucial step to rescue your relationship from fights is to stay committed.
I believe what has made us so successful is that we never give up.
We believe that as Christians our marriage is sacred and that our commitment to each other should reflect our commitment to God.
If you are not a Christian, I think the steps we have been using will still apply to anyone.
If you have found this article useful, I encourage you to visit the website Better Christian Relationships.
It is a free ministry that provides tips, advice, and help for better Christian dating relationships, engagements, marriages, and Christian sexuality.
We also provide tools and resources that you can use in working on your relationship.
Check out my link in my resources box or profile and be blessed! -Dan