Relationships Problems - Are you in an abusive relationship?
You might be surprised but in this society today, you can still hear of stories about abusive relationships. Yes, it is really heartbreaking but real. It might be something you read about from the newspapers or that it has happened to a friend. Worse still, it could even be happening to you. There are various kinds of abusive relationships and it is vital to keep in mind that abuses can be physical as well as mental. Either kind of abuses can be abusive and it will be quite some time before the scars get to heal.
There are hardly any relationships that start off being abusive in nature thus the victims involved will not be prepared and might not even be aware that they are being abused until they are badly scarred. Usually there will be little changes along the way whereby the abusers will abuse and try to make up to the victims after that. This cause the victims to become deeply in love and even make up excuses for the abusers and will not leave or report the abusers. In fact, they might not even be aware that they were being abused! As such, the abusers become more confident that they are in control of the relationships and the abuses continue.
In many of the abuse cases, when the victims finally realized that they were being abused, they would have been so brainwashed by the abusers that they felt it was actually their own fault. So how can you tell if you are being abused by your partner? Check out the list below and if you see some or many of the following patterns appearing in your own relationship, chances are you are a victim in an abusive relationship. If that is the case, it is definitely time to take action to protect yourself for any further abuse!
Partner's Over-Possessive Behaviour
Does you partner force you to make a choice between him and all others who love you, including all your friends and relatives? Does he disallow you to meet even your family? If so, this is actually the start of isolation. Your abuser knows that he must be in total control of you and there must not be any witnesses to his abuses on you, thus you have to be isolated from everyone else.
Occasional Physical or Verbal Assaults
These assaults need not be very frequent or violent ones at the initial stage. Are there occasions (more than once or twice) when your partner hits you in a fit of anger, calls you names, insults you and intentional hurts your self-esteem? If it happens too frequently, you will have to be aware as your partner could be gaining control over you and you are subtly becoming a victim of abuse without even being aware of it.
Financially Under Partner's Control
Do you have equal rights in money matters at home? If he is in control financially, then he has the power to make all decisions and over your spending power. You will not dare to leave him because you do not have money.
The above list does not cover every sign of physical or mental abuses but if you have a feeling that your partner is abusing you, take precaution as it might really be the case. If you cannot get a family member to help you out, seek help from the social workers or even from the police. Do not wait till the abuses get too violent or severe before you seek help, especially if you have children with you as the effects can be detrimental to their development.
There are hardly any relationships that start off being abusive in nature thus the victims involved will not be prepared and might not even be aware that they are being abused until they are badly scarred. Usually there will be little changes along the way whereby the abusers will abuse and try to make up to the victims after that. This cause the victims to become deeply in love and even make up excuses for the abusers and will not leave or report the abusers. In fact, they might not even be aware that they were being abused! As such, the abusers become more confident that they are in control of the relationships and the abuses continue.
In many of the abuse cases, when the victims finally realized that they were being abused, they would have been so brainwashed by the abusers that they felt it was actually their own fault. So how can you tell if you are being abused by your partner? Check out the list below and if you see some or many of the following patterns appearing in your own relationship, chances are you are a victim in an abusive relationship. If that is the case, it is definitely time to take action to protect yourself for any further abuse!
Partner's Over-Possessive Behaviour
Does you partner force you to make a choice between him and all others who love you, including all your friends and relatives? Does he disallow you to meet even your family? If so, this is actually the start of isolation. Your abuser knows that he must be in total control of you and there must not be any witnesses to his abuses on you, thus you have to be isolated from everyone else.
Occasional Physical or Verbal Assaults
These assaults need not be very frequent or violent ones at the initial stage. Are there occasions (more than once or twice) when your partner hits you in a fit of anger, calls you names, insults you and intentional hurts your self-esteem? If it happens too frequently, you will have to be aware as your partner could be gaining control over you and you are subtly becoming a victim of abuse without even being aware of it.
Financially Under Partner's Control
Do you have equal rights in money matters at home? If he is in control financially, then he has the power to make all decisions and over your spending power. You will not dare to leave him because you do not have money.
The above list does not cover every sign of physical or mental abuses but if you have a feeling that your partner is abusing you, take precaution as it might really be the case. If you cannot get a family member to help you out, seek help from the social workers or even from the police. Do not wait till the abuses get too violent or severe before you seek help, especially if you have children with you as the effects can be detrimental to their development.
