Cell Phones Have Destroyed Phone Courtesy
These days it seems like all the teenagers have cell phones, and they use them with little or no supervision.
They're used to calling each other on their cell phones at any time of day or night.
They don't observe the standard rules of etiquette because their parents don't hear them using the phone, so they don't correct the problems.
For instance, I routinely receive phone calls where I pick up the phone and say hello, and the caller asks me to identify myself.
They called me.
I was taught that the caller should identify themselves then ask for the person they wish to speak to.
But that's not what the kids expect.
They expect the person they called to answer their own phone and to already know who's calling because their phone will tell them.
When they hear a different voice, they are surprised, so they ask who it is.
Kids also seem to call at all hours.
I learned that you should never call someone after 10 PM, except in an emergency.
I have been woken up after midnight on several occasions.
The callers clearly thought that they were calling my teenager on her cell phone, and that they wouldn't wake up the parents.
But that's a problem too.
Teenagers need their sleep, and the phone calls have to stop sometime.
Interruptions are standard.
Cell phones and even most house phones have call waiting.
When you're talking to one person, you can see that someone else is calling.
Many people interrupt their first call to take the second.
What happened to giving someone you're undivided attention when you're talking to them? We even had one case of a kid calling to make threats of violence.
His cell phone was set up so that the number was private, and we had trouble tracking down who was making these calls.
Imagine what parents would say if their kids were using the phone attached to the kitchen wall these ways.
But they're not.
They're in the bedrooms or at the park or anywhere else out of their parents' earshot.
As parents, we need to do a better job of teaching our kids the right way to use phones.
Start with the basic rules:
I recommend keeping the cell phone chargers in the kitchen.
Everyone needs to plug their cell phone in before going to bed.
That way the phone isn't in their room all night and they won't be able to make or receive calls.
Also, check your phone bill.
It logs the date and time of inbound and outbound calls and texts.
They're used to calling each other on their cell phones at any time of day or night.
They don't observe the standard rules of etiquette because their parents don't hear them using the phone, so they don't correct the problems.
For instance, I routinely receive phone calls where I pick up the phone and say hello, and the caller asks me to identify myself.
They called me.
I was taught that the caller should identify themselves then ask for the person they wish to speak to.
But that's not what the kids expect.
They expect the person they called to answer their own phone and to already know who's calling because their phone will tell them.
When they hear a different voice, they are surprised, so they ask who it is.
Kids also seem to call at all hours.
I learned that you should never call someone after 10 PM, except in an emergency.
I have been woken up after midnight on several occasions.
The callers clearly thought that they were calling my teenager on her cell phone, and that they wouldn't wake up the parents.
But that's a problem too.
Teenagers need their sleep, and the phone calls have to stop sometime.
Interruptions are standard.
Cell phones and even most house phones have call waiting.
When you're talking to one person, you can see that someone else is calling.
Many people interrupt their first call to take the second.
What happened to giving someone you're undivided attention when you're talking to them? We even had one case of a kid calling to make threats of violence.
His cell phone was set up so that the number was private, and we had trouble tracking down who was making these calls.
Imagine what parents would say if their kids were using the phone attached to the kitchen wall these ways.
But they're not.
They're in the bedrooms or at the park or anywhere else out of their parents' earshot.
As parents, we need to do a better job of teaching our kids the right way to use phones.
Start with the basic rules:
- What hours you can make or receive a phone call
- How to identify yourself and ask for the person you want to speak to
- Give the person you're talking to your full attention
I recommend keeping the cell phone chargers in the kitchen.
Everyone needs to plug their cell phone in before going to bed.
That way the phone isn't in their room all night and they won't be able to make or receive calls.
Also, check your phone bill.
It logs the date and time of inbound and outbound calls and texts.
