The Defiant Child And Behavior Modification - 3 Tips For Parents
Let's face it, a defiant child can put a strain on family life but it can also ruin a marriage. This often happens when parents have different ideas about what defines defiant behaviour and how it should be punished. This immediately creates tension and the child will exploit it for all its worth when he realises there is a good cop and a bad cop in the household.
The first tip is therefore to establish the bottom line and get your spouse's agreement about how it should be enforced. This is one of the first things you learn how to do if you follow a behaviour modification course.
When you are faced with child behavior problems and this could include ADHD, or Oppositional Defiant Disorder (ODD), you may seek help by using medication with stimulant or non-stimulant drugs which may or may not alleviate the child's symptoms. The problem here is that while medication can work in many cases, the foundations of establishing a code of behaviour is not going to be provided by taking tablets or pills. No pill will teach a child how to behave!
My second tip is to look beyond medication and seek a more permanent solution by having a careful look at behavior therapy. In this type of course or therapy sessions, you can learn a whole set of strategies for every situation especially when dealing with defiance.
How do set the limits? What is the bottom line? How are you going to deal with the homework battle and what about curfews and how do you impose them when confronted with defiance. Again, these techniques can be learned in behavior modification courses.
My third tip, as a general rule is not to have too many rigid rules and limits. Once you have established a bottom line and below that you will not go, you can be a little more flexible about other less important issues. There will be room for negotiation and you can be supportive while still being firm.
Often parents are at a loss at how to deal with defiant children and defiance can start at a very young age and that is difficult. But parents can learn skills and I know families who bless the day that they started a behaviour modification course and regained a happy serene family atmosphere as a result.
The first tip is therefore to establish the bottom line and get your spouse's agreement about how it should be enforced. This is one of the first things you learn how to do if you follow a behaviour modification course.
When you are faced with child behavior problems and this could include ADHD, or Oppositional Defiant Disorder (ODD), you may seek help by using medication with stimulant or non-stimulant drugs which may or may not alleviate the child's symptoms. The problem here is that while medication can work in many cases, the foundations of establishing a code of behaviour is not going to be provided by taking tablets or pills. No pill will teach a child how to behave!
My second tip is to look beyond medication and seek a more permanent solution by having a careful look at behavior therapy. In this type of course or therapy sessions, you can learn a whole set of strategies for every situation especially when dealing with defiance.
How do set the limits? What is the bottom line? How are you going to deal with the homework battle and what about curfews and how do you impose them when confronted with defiance. Again, these techniques can be learned in behavior modification courses.
My third tip, as a general rule is not to have too many rigid rules and limits. Once you have established a bottom line and below that you will not go, you can be a little more flexible about other less important issues. There will be room for negotiation and you can be supportive while still being firm.
Often parents are at a loss at how to deal with defiant children and defiance can start at a very young age and that is difficult. But parents can learn skills and I know families who bless the day that they started a behaviour modification course and regained a happy serene family atmosphere as a result.
