Assisted Living Insider Secrets From a 20 Year Veteran Administrator - Part II
If you have determined that the time for Assisted Living is near, for your parent or spouse.
There is an overwhelming amount of basic information to be gathered: location, price, comfort.
Then when you add types of services: medication management, bathing, escorts, it adds another level of complexity to the process.
Now, when you add in more global factors, like proximity to friends, relatives and doctors and changing health status, it gets even more difficult.
Everyone wants to make the right choice, and god-forbid that the whole process might have to be repeated because of an unseen or unaccounted factor.
Admittedly it's a stressful process.
And few people have any previous knowledge in this field.
Few are the number of people that have a friend or relative in the "aging" business.
If you are one, count yourself lucky and why then would you be reading this article? Here's the scoop: every Assisted Living has at least one full-time marketing person, whose sole job is to convince you that their assisted living is the perfect match for you and your loved one.
To that end they give you brochures, comparison sheets, tours and meals, floor plans, the works.
I would not compare it to car sales, but many of the large assisted living chains have training for their sales people on how to overcome resistance.
Granted, as an executive director of an assisted living, I see both sides of the story, and on your end you may feel stuck between picking the right place and trying to convince mom and dad that they need this.
Even though they may be in denial that for their own health and safety they need to be in a more structured, supervised environment.
Here's the rest of the story from the first article.
But that's OK, this is a big decision and you need to sure.
Because you do NOT want to move them again.
In fact, there is not enough room here for the remainder of my Insider pointers.
But you can get them at www.
easycaregiving.
com even if you are not dealing with Alzheimer's, if you have older parents and feeling that you will need more information, come sign up for my free newsletter.
There is an overwhelming amount of basic information to be gathered: location, price, comfort.
Then when you add types of services: medication management, bathing, escorts, it adds another level of complexity to the process.
Now, when you add in more global factors, like proximity to friends, relatives and doctors and changing health status, it gets even more difficult.
Everyone wants to make the right choice, and god-forbid that the whole process might have to be repeated because of an unseen or unaccounted factor.
Admittedly it's a stressful process.
And few people have any previous knowledge in this field.
Few are the number of people that have a friend or relative in the "aging" business.
If you are one, count yourself lucky and why then would you be reading this article? Here's the scoop: every Assisted Living has at least one full-time marketing person, whose sole job is to convince you that their assisted living is the perfect match for you and your loved one.
To that end they give you brochures, comparison sheets, tours and meals, floor plans, the works.
I would not compare it to car sales, but many of the large assisted living chains have training for their sales people on how to overcome resistance.
Granted, as an executive director of an assisted living, I see both sides of the story, and on your end you may feel stuck between picking the right place and trying to convince mom and dad that they need this.
Even though they may be in denial that for their own health and safety they need to be in a more structured, supervised environment.
Here's the rest of the story from the first article.
- I find that instinct is your best guide.
Good ole gut feelings often gets borne out as accurate over time.
It's a feeling you can verify: Do staff seem happy? Do they run away from a tour, or do they stand their ground and say hi to people touring? That is often a great indicator of what is going on in the facility. - Think about the facility's proximity to whichever relative is going to be visiting the most.
You have to get honest with yourself about this...
no wishful thinking.
It's like the gym: you may have every intention on going there on a regular basis, but the greater the distance, the more excuses will come up. - This is a big one.
Ask the facility if they had any licensing complaints in the past year.
And then ask to see them! Yes.
They are supposed to be posted, and available to anyone that asks.
Every complaint has the evaluators conclusions on it.
So if a complaint is "unfounded" then it was probably a disgruntled employee or resident, if it was "inconclusive" either the facility covered their tracks well, or again it's due to a former employee or unhappy resident, but if it was "founded" then read the "plan of correction" and then ask the facility representative about their version of events...
watch for evasiveness. - Next, look on the wall for the Ombudsman poster and write down the phone number.
Call them and ask them what they think of the facility.
You will usually get a volunteer (they rely on them a lot), and the even though they are not supposed to express an opinion - they often leap at the chance to talk about what they know about a place.
Many Ombudsmen are a pain in the facility's rear end.
Because no one really knows the rules that govern them, and they are often showing up at a facility unannounced and start asking the residents if they are having any problems.
What neglected old busybody is going to pass up a chance to throw the place 'under the bus'.
(when I say neglected I mean by family not staff). - Take a look or ask about the emergency response system.
Older building will sometimes have a voice intercom in the room, new buildings will have a pendant (like a life alert).
Each has its own advantages.
The voice intercom is great for immediate responses, but can get misused with people using it for non emergency issues.
The pendant has its problems because the resident has to wait for someone to respond, and late at night that can be a long time. - Ask if they offer escorts to the dining room.
Residents often need someone to walk them down to meals, or if in a wheelchair, for someone to push them there and back again.
Ask if they charge for this? Some places will not charge for the service, and this can be something that gets used a lot. - Ask about periodic checks.
What if your loved one is under the weather, and needs someone to look in on her a couple of times during the night.
Some places will charge for that, and others will not.
This is another often overlooked service. - When talking about showers and bathing...
2 or 3 times a week is plenty.
Just because you and I take one or two showers a day, most people over 80 don't need or want to shower that often.
Unless she is incontinent, 3 times a week is plenty.
Is she a big woman? Will she need two caregivers to be with her for things like showers? Ask about extra charges if this applies. - Room/meal trays - how much? This little thing can add up, there are on average 90 meals per month.
What if she needs them for every meal? Do they have a discounted plan for that? - Laundry? Do they charge by the load? Some places will have a laundry day, and they will not count the number of loads (because they use a big commercial washer and dryer), other charge for every single load (average price is $10 - $25 PER LOAD!)
- Be ready for incontinence care.
Nobody likes to think about, but it happens, it is almost inevitable, and it is very expensive.
She may be OK now, but have the flexibility in your budget to accommodate it.
If she needs it...
it will not be optional, and you will not be able to postpone it. - Finally, when you pick a place and move her in, be very conscientious to bring a lot of her stuff to make her feel at home...
But do not bring anything that has a sentimental value or is irreplaceable (beautiful jewelry, stuff that has been in the family for generations, etc.
) Things get broken and thing disappear...
even in the fanciest places. - Also, if she needs cash for a hairdresser or shopping, never give her more than $50 a month, better still, try to arrange to have hairdressers and other service providers bill you.
But that's OK, this is a big decision and you need to sure.
Because you do NOT want to move them again.
In fact, there is not enough room here for the remainder of my Insider pointers.
But you can get them at www.
easycaregiving.
com even if you are not dealing with Alzheimer's, if you have older parents and feeling that you will need more information, come sign up for my free newsletter.
