About Relationships: Marrying Into A Dream
The TV star Kelsey Grammer recently indicated in a TV interview that he thought his third wife married him because he was the very popular TV character, Frasier. She married her dream, and the reality turned out to be an ordinary, vulnerable person with extra-ordinary talents.
Did the same happen when the model Heather Mills married the musician Paul McCartney? Did she also marry a dream and wake up to a different reality?
This does not only happen to rich and famous people. Women often get married to a knight in shining armour who takes them away from circumstances that they dislike - only to find that the sting is not in the circumstances, but in how they view their lives.
For example, a teenage girl married a man who took her away from parents that relied financially on their child, and she had big dreams of a life of being in the limelight. A month after the marriage she found herself pregnant in a culture where abortion was not an option, and where everyone celebrated the arrival of an heir. She discovered that she had moved from an escapable nightmare to an inescapable nightmare, and she was forced into the role of mother prematurely - with disastrous consequences. She eventually died from an overdose of drugs because she could .
We like to read in the press about well-known people having whirlwind romances and getting married quickly. However, we are left with a sense of confusion when those fairy-tale romances disintegrate into bitter public divorces.
How can such an outcome be prevented for an ideal courtship?
The Universe is in complete balance - for every action there is an equal and opposite reaction, as Isaac Newton discovered centuries ago. This has in recent decades been confirmed when it was discovered that every positive charge also has a negative charge.
Where a famous (or not so famous) person is swept away into a wonderful romance, and there is talk of marriage or even living together as an indication of commitment, the couple should be encouraged to take stock of their situation. They should be guided to discover the downside of every dream-like experience that they have together.
And no, this is not the opposite of positive thinking. This is a means of finding balance. If the focus is entirely on the dream-like experiences, the laws of nature will ensure that the nightmare-like side of the experience will be added. Why not rather find the balance before making a public commitment that could result in an equally public down-fall?
For example, when you marry a famous person, you get famous by default for a short time. However, over time the famous, talented person continues to get the attention based on their talents, while the not-so-famous spouse fades into the background.
Even when you marry a person that is successful but not famous, you may find that their success is based on a single-mindedness that excludes everything else while they pursue their dream. And what if you are part of that dream, and you lose their interest once they have achieved you?
Look for the downside of your dream before you leap. That will help you to find balance and make more realistic decisions.
Are you struggling to cope with the reality of your marriage? Do you want to find your own identity while remaining married to a famous or successful person?
I can help you.
Did the same happen when the model Heather Mills married the musician Paul McCartney? Did she also marry a dream and wake up to a different reality?
This does not only happen to rich and famous people. Women often get married to a knight in shining armour who takes them away from circumstances that they dislike - only to find that the sting is not in the circumstances, but in how they view their lives.
For example, a teenage girl married a man who took her away from parents that relied financially on their child, and she had big dreams of a life of being in the limelight. A month after the marriage she found herself pregnant in a culture where abortion was not an option, and where everyone celebrated the arrival of an heir. She discovered that she had moved from an escapable nightmare to an inescapable nightmare, and she was forced into the role of mother prematurely - with disastrous consequences. She eventually died from an overdose of drugs because she could .
We like to read in the press about well-known people having whirlwind romances and getting married quickly. However, we are left with a sense of confusion when those fairy-tale romances disintegrate into bitter public divorces.
How can such an outcome be prevented for an ideal courtship?
The Universe is in complete balance - for every action there is an equal and opposite reaction, as Isaac Newton discovered centuries ago. This has in recent decades been confirmed when it was discovered that every positive charge also has a negative charge.
Where a famous (or not so famous) person is swept away into a wonderful romance, and there is talk of marriage or even living together as an indication of commitment, the couple should be encouraged to take stock of their situation. They should be guided to discover the downside of every dream-like experience that they have together.
And no, this is not the opposite of positive thinking. This is a means of finding balance. If the focus is entirely on the dream-like experiences, the laws of nature will ensure that the nightmare-like side of the experience will be added. Why not rather find the balance before making a public commitment that could result in an equally public down-fall?
For example, when you marry a famous person, you get famous by default for a short time. However, over time the famous, talented person continues to get the attention based on their talents, while the not-so-famous spouse fades into the background.
Even when you marry a person that is successful but not famous, you may find that their success is based on a single-mindedness that excludes everything else while they pursue their dream. And what if you are part of that dream, and you lose their interest once they have achieved you?
Look for the downside of your dream before you leap. That will help you to find balance and make more realistic decisions.
Are you struggling to cope with the reality of your marriage? Do you want to find your own identity while remaining married to a famous or successful person?
I can help you.
