Caught In The Act Pregnancy of First Born
Motherhood [http://talesofayearningmother.blogspot.com/]
was way out of my mind when I was 22 years old then back in Dec. 1999. I was barely working for 2 years and I haven't given any signifant "something" to my oldies as a token of appreciation for all their hardships.
But there I was sitting squarely in front of my parents and cousin (who by the way the one who sent me to college). I was not even talking - I was just crying not because I was afraid of them they would beat me up to death for engaging into pre-marital sex or for breaking their rules. I knew they would certainly not do that. Their love and caring for me was so overwhelming that it elude from each one of them.
I was crying because I am afraid. Period.
For how will I face my first born with certainty in my eyes that I his/her future secured already? How would our first eye contact be? And the very basic question, how will be a mother?
And 9 years had gone by. On June 9, 2009 he will be turning 9 years old. My first born had grown to be a charming, artistic and stubborn little gentleman.
Being a mother really doesnt require a master degree. And indeed patience is a virtue. I remember one conversation with my in-laws when a statement caught my attention. "Kids are like a blank piece of paper. You will see the picture of what you drew in it." That's why for every instances that he is way out of my expectation, I know that in some point, I have my share of fault.
As a working mother for more than 11 years now, no matter how I try to devote quality time to each of my four boys (including husband), I know nothing beats 100% dedication and presence.
was way out of my mind when I was 22 years old then back in Dec. 1999. I was barely working for 2 years and I haven't given any signifant "something" to my oldies as a token of appreciation for all their hardships.
But there I was sitting squarely in front of my parents and cousin (who by the way the one who sent me to college). I was not even talking - I was just crying not because I was afraid of them they would beat me up to death for engaging into pre-marital sex or for breaking their rules. I knew they would certainly not do that. Their love and caring for me was so overwhelming that it elude from each one of them.
I was crying because I am afraid. Period.
For how will I face my first born with certainty in my eyes that I his/her future secured already? How would our first eye contact be? And the very basic question, how will be a mother?
And 9 years had gone by. On June 9, 2009 he will be turning 9 years old. My first born had grown to be a charming, artistic and stubborn little gentleman.
Being a mother really doesnt require a master degree. And indeed patience is a virtue. I remember one conversation with my in-laws when a statement caught my attention. "Kids are like a blank piece of paper. You will see the picture of what you drew in it." That's why for every instances that he is way out of my expectation, I know that in some point, I have my share of fault.
As a working mother for more than 11 years now, no matter how I try to devote quality time to each of my four boys (including husband), I know nothing beats 100% dedication and presence.