Some people are certain of their sexual orientation from earliest memory. For others figuring out sexual orientation is more of a process. Here girls talk about the how they came to identify as bisexual and lesbian and what that has meant for them.

From Sophie Aimee:

"Near the end of 6th grade, I said something to my then only friend (she is still my best friend today) about being happy single, and she mistook it for me asking her out.

I told her I wasn't (Because I wasn't. I was never interested in her that way). But it made me realize that maybe it was much more obvious that I wasn't straight than I had thought. So, from then on, I faked straight. It felt really, really fake and really, really forced, and I find it hard to believe that anyone actually fell for it. But apparently they did, because no one questioned my sexual orientation from then on.

In 9th grade, the teasing subsided, and I finally felt that I could end the facade. I didn't come out, but I stopped faking crushes on boys. I discovered femslash fanfiction, and this geeky thing was my saving grace. I tried on the term "bisexual" at first. It didn't fit. I tried to imagine marrying a man, living with him, having sex with him, and I couldn't. It seemed so wrong. Then I imagined all of these things with a woman, and they just felt right. I tried on the term "lesbian", and it fit. I said to myself "I'm a lesbian", and that was it. I never questioned it again."

From Jade Kiku

"I KNOW that I am not straight. It's more a question of whether I also like men. I don't think I do, but I want to be sure. My dream date would be with someone who is very self-assured yet not stuck up and they're very loving and they would not be a man. A better way to put it is that I want a goddess. That's very cheesy and hopeless-romanticy of me, but that is just who I am. I don't know if it's possible to know so quickly. Like I went from boys, boys, boys, to boys, girls, boys, to girls, boys, girls, to now girls, girls, girls!"

From Buffy Addict:

"I've always been super boy crazy. But in 7th grade I met this girl Rina, who I didn't like at first. But soon we became really good friends and I would spend the night at her house. She was the first crush I had ever gotten on a girl. For a while I've thought I was bi, but lately I don't know. It seems like I've only been falling for girls so I'm just plain confused. And as for coming out, I wouldn't really mind coming out to my school because everyone would be very accepting but I want to wait until know for sure. I was looking through an old diary of mine and in one of the entries I wrote: Sometimes I worry, OH NO WHAT IF I'M A LESBIAN?! But it just couldn't happen, guys are just tooooooo hot! lol."