Can You Be Friends With an Ex?
Breaking up seems so...
permanent.
You take this person you fell in love with, talked to, saw every day, and suddenly you're not even allowed to say hello.
For this reason, many people try to stay friends after a break up, thinking they can make a non-romantic type of relationship work.
But what if you're still in love with your ex boyfriend or girlfriend.
Can you be friends with an ex if you want them back? The answer of course, is a resounding no.
Sorry if that's not the answer you wanted to hear, but at least it's an honest one.
Being friends after a breakup is a myth - a complete fantasy that falls apart at the first real sign of change, either on your end or on that of your ex.
Let's examine the facts: you still love your ex.
You still want them, and hope to one day be with them.
Right away the 'friendship' is a lie, and this is because you're only using it as a vehicle to hopefully get back together again.
On top of that you're also deceiving your ex, who might think you're legitimately trying to befriend them.
When he or she finds out your real intentions? The reaction probably isn't going to be too good.
Listing the reasons you can't be friends with an ex is easy.
Here are just a few:
Because that's what being a friend is all about.
And as they spend more and more time with their new boyfriend or girlfriend, your ex will pay less and less attention to you.
The rejection will even feel twice as bad as it did during the breakup.
So what should you do? What do you say to an ex boyfriend or ex girlfriend who wants to be friends with you? Easy: You tell them NO.
And the reason you tell them no is because staying friends allows them to continue keeping you 'around' while they do their own thing.
Take yourself completely away from their life, and suddenly your ex starts missing you.
There's a big hole in that person's life where you used to be, and they can't just reach out and call you when they get lonely.
If you want your ex back, your goal is to make them lonely.
Your ex won't ever get back together with you until he or she needs you back in their life again.
This goes for any couple, anywhere, no matter what the circumstances of the breakup.
Your ex must want you back before you can reverse your current situation.
Being friends with your ex is a terribly weak substitute for an actual relationship, and it never leads to reconciliation.
If you're looking to get back with an ex boyfriend or ex girlfriend, you need to work toward that particular goal.
Don't pretend to be friends thinking it will get you closer to your ex again, and don't lie about wanting to still hang out even after breaking up.
You can be friends with your ex OR you can walk the path to getting them back, but you can't do both.
permanent.
You take this person you fell in love with, talked to, saw every day, and suddenly you're not even allowed to say hello.
For this reason, many people try to stay friends after a break up, thinking they can make a non-romantic type of relationship work.
But what if you're still in love with your ex boyfriend or girlfriend.
Can you be friends with an ex if you want them back? The answer of course, is a resounding no.
Sorry if that's not the answer you wanted to hear, but at least it's an honest one.
Being friends after a breakup is a myth - a complete fantasy that falls apart at the first real sign of change, either on your end or on that of your ex.
Let's examine the facts: you still love your ex.
You still want them, and hope to one day be with them.
Right away the 'friendship' is a lie, and this is because you're only using it as a vehicle to hopefully get back together again.
On top of that you're also deceiving your ex, who might think you're legitimately trying to befriend them.
When he or she finds out your real intentions? The reaction probably isn't going to be too good.
Listing the reasons you can't be friends with an ex is easy.
Here are just a few:
- You'll always be weird and insecure around your ex.
- The jealousy of watching your ex do things without you will be overwhelming.
- You'll constantly be in fear of your ex getting a new boyfriend or girlfriend.
- The boundries of your friendship are never clearly defined.
- You'll always be pretending NOT to have feelings that you really do.
Because that's what being a friend is all about.
And as they spend more and more time with their new boyfriend or girlfriend, your ex will pay less and less attention to you.
The rejection will even feel twice as bad as it did during the breakup.
So what should you do? What do you say to an ex boyfriend or ex girlfriend who wants to be friends with you? Easy: You tell them NO.
And the reason you tell them no is because staying friends allows them to continue keeping you 'around' while they do their own thing.
Take yourself completely away from their life, and suddenly your ex starts missing you.
There's a big hole in that person's life where you used to be, and they can't just reach out and call you when they get lonely.
If you want your ex back, your goal is to make them lonely.
Your ex won't ever get back together with you until he or she needs you back in their life again.
This goes for any couple, anywhere, no matter what the circumstances of the breakup.
Your ex must want you back before you can reverse your current situation.
Being friends with your ex is a terribly weak substitute for an actual relationship, and it never leads to reconciliation.
If you're looking to get back with an ex boyfriend or ex girlfriend, you need to work toward that particular goal.
Don't pretend to be friends thinking it will get you closer to your ex again, and don't lie about wanting to still hang out even after breaking up.
You can be friends with your ex OR you can walk the path to getting them back, but you can't do both.
